Author Archives: Nate Raby

About Nate Raby

Just a guy who from New Orleans who likes to write and yell a lot.

Programming Note: The NFL Sucks, So I’m Going to Costa Rica

Hey guys, Nate here. Letting you know that I’ll be gone until the October 28. I’m getting married this weekend and I’ll be spending my honeymoon in Costa Rica, so updates will have to come strictly from Ben, who is still struggling to find time escaping from his work dungeon to give you piping fresh takes. He’ll continue to have Monday Morning Jerkface, and whatever other stuff he fancies. Maybe Matt will give us another I Suck at Fantasy Football post. Maybe one of our other writers will return from the dead. Maybe you, YES YOU, will write a guest post, send it into, and we’ll run it. Anything could happen.

Ben should have something up tomorrow. Until then, I’ll see you guys unless I fall in love with Costa Rica and never want to leave. Wait, they don’t have DirecTV? Okay, fine, I’ll be back soon.

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Let’s Just Stop Doubting the Niners, Okay?

In the tumultuous world of football, there are very few things you can predict, and even fewer things you can guarantee. So many moving parts make it hard to know exactly what you’re going to get every Sunday, Monday, and Thursday (Jesus, football is on too many days.) And it makes sense that we try to find information to help us on this impossible quest to determine the future in the NFL. But sometimes that overeagerness can be problematic.

What does that vestigial paragraph have to do with anything? Probably nothing. I’ve had too much coffee this morning.

But what it really means is the San Francisco 49ers are a good team, and they will be for a while, and we should probably just shut the fuck up about their weaknesses, k? Continue reading

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The Trial of Jim Schwartz

During training camp former Lions defensive coordinator Jim Schwartz told some of his Bills players that if they were victorious over Detroit this season that he wanted to be carried off the field. Everyone had a good laugh, because he can’t be serious right?


Well then.

As you can imagine this caused its share of controversy, outrage, and abandoned cars being set on fire. Never change, Detroit. But perhaps the biggest of Schwartz’s problems is being dragged before the Footbawl Blog’s highly reputable courtroom. He is being charged with four counts of being a big time jackass. Benjamin Van Iten is the prosecuting attorney, and Nathan Raby will be handling the defense. The judge, as always, is a creepy mannequin because that’s the sort of budget we’re working with here.

The jury…IS YOU! Continue reading


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Drew Brees’ Performance: Injury, Decline, or Space Aliens?

Lost in the Saints’ 37-31 overtime victory over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers was how subpar Drew Brees played. Well, it was probably lost to most other fans. It certainly wasn’t lost to the Who Dat Nation, who are probably doing something stupid like advocating a tank for Mariotta right now (spoiler alert: they’re definitely doing it). The fact is, Brees hasn’t looked like Breesus this year. Through five games, he’s thrown nine touchdowns and six interceptions, which isn’t exactly Geno Smith bad, but it isn’t what you expect of a possible Top 10 All-Time Quarterback.

Whenever these inconsistencies in play arise, it’s natural for people to try and find an explanation. Well look no further, Saints fans! I’ve compiled the evidence for and against the three most likely explanations to Brees’ poor performance thus far: injury, decline, or space aliens? Continue reading

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Hey, NFL, These Changes Will Make Your Football Fields Look Awesome!

Today NBA writer Zach Lowe posted this tweet revealing the New Orleans Pelicans’ brand new innovative court design.

It’s awesome! Rather than just pick a team color like most NBA teams do, they decided to put their badass murder death bird logo in the entire court. It’s loud and it’s different. Couple this with Cleveland’s new court design featuring the Cleveland skyline (no word on how many abandoned buildings will be in the design), and it’s clear that the NBA is dedicated to taking creative strides to keep things interesting.

NFL, it’s your turn to step up! Continue reading

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