Category Archives: Articles

The Cleveland Slightly Darker Browns

http://www.clevelandbrowns.com/team/2015_Logos.html

dawg pound

The Experts at Footbawl Blog’s fresh take:

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Haters Gon’ Hate: Yeah yeah yeah Winston had a great combine BUT HAVE YOU SEEN THAT DUDE’S BEER BELLY?

Peter King says he’s an 80% chance to be the #1 pick. Bleacher Report says he’s blowing people away in interviews. His throwing was impeccable, and people can’t stop raving about how good he’s looked at the combine.

Oh hey that’s great ARE WE JUST GOING TO IGNORE THAT HE SHOWED UP LOOKING LIKE HE’S AT A 40 YEAR HIGH SCHOOL REUNION?

winston

Source: an official picture. Probably from a sports website.

THAT BELLY.

LOOK AT IT.

The weirdest part is that he reportedly LOST WEIGHT before this appearance. God knows how many crab legs he had scarfed down since his loss to Oregon.

Also weird is people are just dismissing the fact that he had one of the worst 40 yard dash performances we’ve ever seen from a skill player. I’VE RUN A 40 IN ALMOST THAT TIME AND I’M AS ATHLETIC AS A THREE-LEGGED PORCUPINE.

Look, I get that people overvalue measurables, and just because he runs slower than offensive linemen doesn’t mean he won’t be a good NFL quarterback. But we can’t just completely dismiss the bad stuff and rave about his interviews because he seems slightly apologetic for being an immature kid in college. We can’t just create whatever narrative makes us feel better. We need to take everything that happened this weekend and evaluate it together.

NOW LOOK AT THAT BELLY.

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Laces Out Episode Eleven: Fuck the Clippers?

This week on the Laces Out Podcast, contributor Joe Schmidt joined Ben and I as we talked about the Super Bowl, the Buffalo Bills, basketball buzzer beaters, and horrific sports moments. We also had moments where Ben said Rex Ryan is a Top 5 coach and Nate found out he’s the only person who hates the Clippers. It was a great time!

Programmer note: Ben and Joe are a little echo-y because we’re not good at this.

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A Serious Look At The Patriots’ Legacy

A week ago today, we were talking about playcalls, Skittles, and the amazing Left Shark. While we haven’t stopped talking about Left Shark, the conversation has died down on most of the football-related aspects of the Super Bowl. This is how it happens every year: we process what just happened, shove an entire week’s analysis in a span of a few days, and then hibernate like bears until August.

Man I wish I could hibernate until August.

But now, with the confetti being cleaned off of the streets of Boston and teams already making roster moves for next year (Richie Incognito has a job, let’s all get really mad!), it’s a good time to talk about legacies. We’re no longer blinded by the immediacy of the game, so shouting “TOM BRADY IS THE BEST QUARTERBACK OF ALL GALAXIES” won’t be as quickly ignored (although it should be, you should never shout something like that and expect to be taken seriously).

So let’s take a quick look at where this Patriots team stands now that they’ve won their 4th championship in this young century. Continue reading

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The Media Was Right (GASP): The Redskins Don’t See RG3 As QB of the Future

Every once in a while (read: like once a fucking week) the media will latch onto something that is essentially a non-story. It’s usually some perceived slight that the media makes into a much bigger deal than it actually is (“Did LeBron mean to shoulder bump his coach? Does he actually think Coach Spoelstra is Satan?”). So when I first heard about Robert Griffin III being left off of the letter to season ticket holders, I felt like it was probably more of the same. Like perhaps no one was listed and the media was upset that the letter wasn’t basically “HEY THANKS FOR ROOTING FOR THE TEAM RG3 PLAYS FOR!”

So pretty much like this

So pretty much like this

But after reading the letter, I have a new position. I hate to say this, but maybe the media is right about this one. Continue reading

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