Category Archives: Articles

The REAL and NOT FAKE AT ALL Story of RG3’s Day After Quitting Twitter

"But I'll keep snapchat...just 'cause."

“But I’ll keep snapchat…just ’cause.”

Hey, guys, it’s me, RG3. I’m writing through this blog to let you know that I’m quitting social media for now. I didn’t like the way people criticized me for my poor play.  It was unfair for people to just attack me through social media like that. And I thought that was that, you know? I could go about my business, throw a billion interceptions, and not have to hear about it.

But then it got worse. Continue reading

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Your Favorite Team Sucks: The Chicago Bears

I want to start this off by saying that I understand.

I understand why the Bears signed Jay Cutler to an extension. I understand why they didn’t just roll the dice with Josh McCown. Quarterback is a tricky position, and if you have a guy who is good enough, you don’t get rid of him for the mystery. The quarterbacks who could have replaced Cutler were no guarantee to be better, or even comparable. Getting rid of a quarterback with talent is one of the hardest things for a franchise to do. So I completely understand.

But at the same time, sometimes you’re in a situation where you lose no matter what you do.

And that’s where your favorite team finds itself. No matter what the Bears do, they suck.

Just one of many great results of my "Bears suck" google search

Just one of many great results of my “Bears suck” google search

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Monday Morning Jerkface: Week Fifteen

This is the exact look I had on my face during this play as well

This is the exact look I had on my face during this play as well

“Let’s try Z-44 Roger Split Left here, I think the safety will be cheating a little,” you say into the headset. The QB doesn’t answer, because by this point in both of your careers you are on the same page.

Another explanation for his silence is you are sitting at home watching the game on TV, and that headset isn’t plugged into anything.

This is Monday Morning Jerkface. Continue reading

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God Hates Arizona

And not just because of their crazy politicians.

Ryan-Lindley

WELCOME TO THE THIS GUY ERA, ARIZONA!

This guy is your starting quarterback now. He may or may not have played Beans in Even Stevens, and now he’s your quarterback. You’re going to make the playoffs, which means this guy may be facing actual legitimate defenses.

I’d say good luck, but you won’t get any. God hates you, Arizona. If Drew Stanton wasn’t proof enough, last night’s Catanzaro-fest should be. Either start praying or change your team colors, because clearly it makes you look like the Devil, which is causing God to smite you.

Kurt Warner should’ve never retired. He loved Jesus.

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Cam Newton Is an Asshole In Football, But That Doesn’t Mean You Should Be One In Real Life

Nate is a loyal Saints fan, and has been ever since he was wearing an Aints bag on his head in Dome games in the early 90s. Every once in a while, though, he needs to disagree with a majority of the Who Dat Nation when they hold ridiculous opinions, like the opinion that Cam Newton deserved his car wreck because he’s a jerk.

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Seriously, this is nothing to laugh at. (Source: ABC News)

Seriously, this is nothing to laugh at. (Source: ABC News)

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