Yesterday Nate filled in for me on my Monday morning overreaction piece, so today I’m going to take over for him on two of his usual Footbawl Blog duties: this feature, and laughing heartily at the Falcons.
Last night, as Nick Folk’s kick sailed through the uprights and Rex Ryan started doing his patented jiggly fist pumps, the first thing I thought about was the Jets’ margin of victory. It was less than three points. At the end of the first half the opposing coach had a chance to take a virtually guaranteed three points. He didn’t do that. And why you ask?
Because your favorite coach is Mike Smith…and he fucking sucks.
“Way to overcome adversity guys! And by that I mean…me.”
Mike Smith doesn’t suck simply because of the sequence at the end of the first half, or because they lost in the end, he sucks because he has all the restraint of me playing Madden after bar time hammered off my ass. He is one of those coaches, like Andy Reid and Mike McCarthy for instance, that while they might have great football minds…really have a tendency to make inexplicably bad decisions in key situations. Mike Smith sucks because last night wasn’t an isolated incident. Let’s turn back the clock a bit, shall we? Continue reading
The Pittsburgh Steelers are the sole leader in Super Bowl titles with
7 6 THANK YOU LUKE. They are a model franchise with only three head coaches since 1962. They are an iconic feature to the National Football League, and one that belongs in the conversation when you talk about the best franchise in the league.
Today, though? Today they fucking suck.
Source: Someone who takes really funny pictures
Where’d you get those jerseys? The “teams that suck store”? See what I did there?
Forget that the Atlanta Falcons were one quarter away from going to the Super Bowl. Forget that they ran away with the NFC South Title. Forget that Matt Ryan had a great season, and the Falcons’ defense was stifling all year. Forget that this was as good a team as Atlanta has ever fielded.
Your favorite team is the Atlanta Falcons, and they fucking suck. Continue reading
In the NFL, we are obsessed with peaking. Everyone is concerned with teams getting hot at the right time. It makes sense; after all, the last two Super Bowl champions were mediocre to above average for most of the season before they rattled off four straight wins.
Here at the Footbawl Blog, we aren’t as concerned with peaks. Let the ESPNs and NFL.coms of the world handle it. We here appreciate crashing more than peaking, and today, it’s time to pay attention to one of the great crashing stories of the year, and simultaneously the pick for Your Favorite Team sucks this week.
Ladies and gentlemen, your 2012 Baltimore Ravens! Continue reading
Going into last night’s game, the pessimistic Saints fan in me cried, “The Eagles offense may be struggling, but the Saints defense has a cure for that!”
I was apparently wrong, and it was the other way around. I was wrong because I forgot one very important thing.
Your favorite player is Michael Vick, and boy does he suck.
I wouldn’t say it’s a bounty hit, but it sure looks dirty…