Tag Archives: matt forte

by | March 6, 2012 · 8:59 am

Team Retrospectives: The Chicago Bears

Hey guys! Man was that vacation great! In fact, I have to say the only thing bad about it was Ben sending me daily texts threatening to cut my balls off if I didn’t come back to work soon. He’s such a sweet talker! Anyway, let’s talk about the Bears!

Six Flags could make a ride out of the Chicago Bears 2011 season. In the beginning of the season, they looked overmatched on defense and sporadic on offense. Towards the middle of the season, they were clicking on all cylinders, winning five straight games and establishing themselves firmly in playoff contention. And then, in the span of two games, they lost their best offensive weapons, and everything went downhill. They finished the season 1-5, ending the year at 8-8 and leaving all of their fans to wonder what could have been.

The good news is that the team was looking good enough in the middle of the season that they can bank on having success barring further injuries. The bad news is Matt Forte still isn’t locked into a big deal, the offensive line still needs help, and the defense is getting older and older every day. Also, the Packers are still great, the Lions are getting even better, and the Vikings might not suck that much this year (haha that’s probably a lie!). In any case, Chicago fan will probably have a lot to complain about, which is good for them because they sure do love complaining! This is the Chicago Bears 2011 Retrospective.

I used to always think the Bear was roaring menacingly, but it actually looks like he's saying "Oh shit, we play in the same division as the Packers, we're screwed!"

Team Highlight: This has to be the 37-13 lambasting they put on up and comers Detroit in Week 10. Despite scoring only one offensive touchdown, the Bears hammered the Lions with a strong defensive and special teams effort. Two of Matt Stafford’s interceptions were returned for TDs, and the defense also forced 2 fumbles for a total of 6 turnovers. More important than the actual game was the message it sent to the Lions: you might be the new story in our division, but we’re still the 2nd best team here. Of course, that was before they shit the bed to end the year, but we didn’t know that then!

Team Lowlight: I’m going to cover more than one game and focus on 3 games in the 5 game losing streak. Against the Chiefs, Seahawks, and Broncos, three of the lesser teams in the NFL (because by this point we’ve sufficiently discounted the Broncos as a playoff team), the Bears averaged 9 points and 215 yards of offense. This clearly was a result of losing both Jay Cutler and Matt Forte, but what made it worse is that the Bears gave up 38 points to the Seahawks, 21 of it to their fairly weak offense. It was up to the defense to support the injured offense, and they weren’t able to do it.

Matt Forte laughing at how he screwed my fantasy team over.

 

Team MVP: I almost want to split this between Forte and Cutler, but Forte’s usage rate in the first 12 games shows he was clearly the workhorse. Before being injured, he led the league in yards from scrimmage. He was part of the reason Cutler was enjoying a good year before his own injury. If the Bears are going to make the playoffs again, much of it depends on Forte.

Needs: Besides signing Forte long-term, they also need some offensive line help, as well as tight end and receiver upgrades. Someone like Mario Manningham or, better yet, Vincent Jackson would help solidify the Bears receiving corps. They also need a real playmaker in the secondary. They have Briggs and Urlacher at LB, Peppers at DE, but no one in the secondary who can consistently make big plays.

What’s in a Bears Fan’s Liquor Cabinet: Cheap whiskey and a shot glass. Whiskey shots are the equivalent of the Bears’ season. The first few hurt going down, and you have to fight the initial urge to gag. But after a few, they start going down easy, and everything is fun and awesome! But then it all catches up with you and you end up like this girl.

On the plus side, those boots look amazing.

Straight Cash Homey Meter:

It'd be like a really, really delayed trade for Bernard Berrian!

I think it makes perfect sense. A team that needs a receiver that is otherwise productive on offense, a good quarterback, Mike Tice as offensive coordinator; I can definitely see Moss fitting in well here. Obviously if the Bears land Jackson, Manningham, or Colston they won’t need him, but he could still be worth a look. And if nothing else, he’ll do better than Roy Williams.

Entirely Too Early Prediction for 2012: 10-6. I don’t think the Bears schedule looks too intimidating, and with their stars back on offense, they will probably be able to battle for 2nd place in the division. I don’t think they’ll catch the Packers, but I do think they’ll do pretty well.

Join us tomorrow when Chris takes on everyone’s favorite Purple team, the Vikings!

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by | November 10, 2011 · 10:46 am

The Footbawl Blog’s Midseason Awards

By the end of this last week of NFL action a majority of teams have played exactly 8 games.  This is the halfway point of the season, and we have discovered many things: the Packers are good, the Colts are bad, Albert Haynseworth still doesn’t give a shit, and if we don’t contain Tebow mania it might engulf the entire nation like that virus in The Stand.  And because this is a pro football blog we feel compelled to hand out mid-season awards that don’t mean a damn thing.  Ben and Nate share their selections below.

MVP (other than Aaron Rodgers)

Ben – Unless you are Skip Bayless, or a relative of his troll family, you know who the MVP of the first half of the season is.  I have been a die-hard Packer fan since before Favre even came into the league, and I am quite biased to be sure, but on this issue it doesn’t matter because everyone else agrees with me too.  Aaron Rodgers looks like he is inside of a game of Madden with the difficulty set on “Rookie”, and the opposing defense is being controlled by a drunk guy who has never played the game before.  So with that in mind let’s talk about who the MVP of the league other than Aaron.

Everyone always debates about whether this award should truly go to the most valuable player, or to the best performance (on a winning team.)  The fact of the matter is this will always be a blend of the two.  It can’t always be the former because otherwise we’d just rename it the Peyton Manning trophy and be done with it.  But I think I’m going to go away from the QB position and do the un-thinkable and give the coveted “MVP other than Aaron Rodgers for the first half of the season” trophy to a Chicago Bear.

Matt Forte has almost 50% of his team’s yards from scrimmage.  That’s kind of insane.  There are a lot of people making the case that he shouldn’t get a huge contract because of what has happened with Chris Johnson.  But for one of the top five (maybe even top 2) running backs in football to be making basically the league minimum?  That’s ridiculous.  But if a big contract is a jinx I’m all for it.  Pay the man!

Nate – Skip Bayless is my second cousin. Aaron Rodgers may be my vote for MVP, but I don’t think it’s as clear as Ben makes it. Mostly because I’ve always seen the MVP award as something that should be more exciting than just “who’s playing the best for the best team.” And Aaron Rodgers has a ton of great weapons. He has a defense that is pretty good at keeping the pressure off of his back. And I honestly think that if Matt Flynn starts on this team, the Packers wouldn’t be 0-8. They’d probably be more like 4-4.

The problem with throwing Rodgers out as top MVP candidate is, much like throwing the Packers out as the undisputed top team, there isn’t a clear cut number 2. I could say Drew Brees, who is going to obliterate the single season yardage record. I could say Matt Forte, but it’d be copying. So instead I’m going to go with Eli Manning. Manning needs credit for several reasons. Not only is he having his best season so far, but he has taken a New York Giants team that no one talked about in the preseason to a 6-2 record. People think that the Giants will fall off thanks to a brutal second half schedule, but who’s to say they will? Eli has been playing so well that he might be able to pull his team to victory against the tough teams. He proved last week that he can by going into Foxboro and beating the Patriots on a heroic last-minute drive. Going back to my point about Rodgers, do you think this team with a decimated offense would be 6-2 without Super Eli running the show? No way. They wouldn’t have beaten the Bills, the Patriots, or the Eagles, and they would have lost to the Seahawks by more. Maybe this new Eli can lift the Giants to new heights. And I think that’s worthy of an MVP mention.

Defensive Player of the (first half of the) Year

Ben – I’m going with Darelle Revis. Revis finally gets his. And by ‘his’ I mean an irrelevant award on a site no one has heard of.

Nate – My defensive player of the year is Jared Allen. Serious stats. Serious sacks. Serious facial hair. Need I say more?

Rookie of the (first half of the) Year

Ben – I’ve gone back and forth on this one.  When the year started it seemed impossible to not say Cam Newton.  He had multiple 400+ yard passing games, and seemed to really get the offense.  He reminded us all that Steve Smith is a douchebag with talent, not just a douchebag being underthrown by Jimmy Claussen.  There were some turnovers, sure, but you usually forgive that (to an extent) from a young QB.  Then I saw what Andy Dalton has done, less flashy sure, but he’s efficient and he’s winning games.  I was all set to give the Bengals signal caller the nod for the first half but then when I thought about it more I was starting to get this award mixed up with “The MVP award for rookies” which is not what I think it is.  It simply means the best rookie, record be darned.  And in that case I have to go back to Cam .

Also, for the record, I don’t think I’ve ever been more wrong about a college player coming out of the draft.  I thought he’d be a bust.  Not just a bust, a Jamarcus Russell bust.  He never overly impressed me in college, just ran that stupid zone read play and college kids couldn’t tackle him.  But now he looks like a complete QB.  I think I figured it out; they just weren’t paying him enough at Auburn ! (rimshot)

Nate – I avoided copying Ben for the MVP, but I can’t here. Cam Newton has been playing out of his mind. Andy Dalton is benefitting from an underappreciated defense. That’s not to say he hasn’t been impressive, but I think the second half of the season will prove that Dalton is still a rookie.

And even though Cam’s team has lost most of their games, they are competitive. They have only lost one game by more than a touchdown, and they were winning for most of that game too. The Panthers have come so close, and the law of averages dictates that they’ll eventually start coming out on the better side of those games. Plus, and Ben touched on this, he should win this award for his rejuvenation of Steve Smith’s career alone.

Coach of the (first half of the) Year

Ben – Now this award I will give to a Bengal.  Marvin Lewis lost his QB because of the erosion between Palmer and team owner Paul Brown’s relationship, and best two wide receivers to free agency and injury.  Cedric Benson’s yards per carry was down to 3.5 in 2010 and the rookie QB they drafted to sit behind Palmer had to start right away.  They had already started to mass-produce paper bags to cover their fans heads when a funny thing happened: they started to win football games.  They still haven’t played the Steelers or the Ravens yet, so the second half of their season doesn’t look quite as bright but that’s not what these awards are about damnit!

Nate – I think this is the award with the most viable candidates. Lewis has worked miracles with the Bengals. Chan Gailey has seemingly recreated the movie The Replacements with his random assortment of rag-tag players (although making a comparison of Keanu Reeves and Harvard grad Ryan Fitzpatrick might be the meanest thing done to Buffalo since moving the Buffalo Braves to San Diego). Jim Caldwell deserves a HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no.

But of all of these names that deserve mention, it is clearly Jim Harbaugh that is the Coach of the Year through the midway point. Because, honestly: what have the 49ers changed from last year to this year? They dropped Mike Singeltary, who clearly couldn’t do it. And they hired Harbaugh, who clearly can. I’ve used the word “clearly” three times in this paragraph, and that’s because I think this is the most obvious choice of the awards. The award is usually given to a guy who makes a sucky team into a non-sucky team. If such a long and complicated phrase as “guy who makes a sucky team into a non-sucky team” were in the dictionary, Jim Harbaugh would slap the hand of that dictionary a little too hard.

Best Game

Ben – Packers/Saints, week one.  Suck it Nate!  On a serious note, I’d have to say…wait, no, that’s seriously my pick.

Nate – That was a great game, Ben. I can’t wait until after the season when I can answer this question “Packers/Saints, NFC Championship. Suck it, Ben!” But until then, I think I have to choose the second game between the Ravens/Steelers, Week 9. The game was actually two games, both of them interesting. The first half was a defensive struggle; the second half was a tense battle for time and position. And for Joe Flacco to suddenly not be Joe Flacco for 92 yards was very impressive. I laughed, I cried, I poked fun at Big Ben. Would totally watch again.

Biggest Play

Ben – For me its Torrey Smith’s game winning touchdown catch this last Sunday.  It shifted the power in the AFC north and might have defined the conference’s best team.  The fact that it took place in a game that showcased the league’s best rivalry doesn’t hurt either.

Nate – My biggest play of the year is also from last week. Patrick Peterson’s 99 yard punt return was not only the play that won the game, but it showcased Peterson’s speed and spin moves. Fun fact: Peterson already has tied the franchise record for punt return TDs – in his 8th game. One more and we’ll never have to say the name Vai Sikahema again. He’ll be the defensive rookie of the year winner, I bet. WAY NOT TO MAKE THAT CATEGORY, BEN.

Most Punchable Face

 

Ben – This is a particularly challenging award to hand out.  For the last few years Jay Cutler has always been in the conversation.  He’s got that look on his face like he just smoked his first joint and now he’s going to go surfing and/or have sex with your girlfriend.  But this year I think his old buddy Philip Rivers has finally overtaken him.  If you need any evidence, please look above.

Nate – Great choice, Ben. I’ve wanted to punch that bastard since he came into the league. But I think, right now, the most punchable face in the NFL for me is…

YEAH BEN! THAT’S RIGHT! MR. DISCOUNT DOUBLE CHECK HIMSELF! In reality, I like Aaron Rodgers, but right now he’s so good he deserves a punch in the face. Plus maybe it will make his nose look smaller.

Post your award winners (and even your own award categories) in the comments section!

Posted by The Footbawl Blog Staff

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by | November 4, 2011 · 9:37 am

An absolutely REAL and NOT FAKE AT ALL conversation between Matt Forte and Chris Johnson

Chris: Anybody wanna race? How about you?

Kenny: I’m injured, man. I can barely walk.

Chris: Chicken!

Chris walks down the practice field.

Chris: How about you?

Munchak: I’m your coach.

Chris: Fine. Nobody wants to race me. Everybody’s scared. Everybody knows I got that getting away from the cops speed.

Chris sees someone in black and orange sitting on the sideline.

Chris: Hey Matt Forte. Wanna race?

Matt: No, I don’t want to race you. I want to talk to you.

Chris: We can talk while we race.

Matt: Nobody’s racing.

Chris: Man, everyone wanted to race me last year.

Matt: That’s because you were a big deal last year. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Chris, you’re killing me, and not just because I drafted you on my fantasy team.

Chris: That’s cold, man.

Matt: No, it’s fine, I also drafted myself so I’m top of my league. Anyway, you gotta start playing better. It might be the only way I get paid.

Chris: I don’t get it.

Matt: Look, man. You were getting paid less than a million dollars, just like me. You put up great numbers, just like me. You were playing for an overrated coach, just like me.

Chris: I got better hair though.

Matt: That may be. But all the same, your poor performance this year is making it really hard for me. No matter how much I dominate, no matter how much of my team’s offense I’m responsible for, Lovie Smith’s eyes, which don’t normally open all the way, will bug out when he sees how you’ve performed after the huge contract you got.

Chris: It ain’t a big deal. You don’t get a contract for your expectations, you get it for what you’ve done in the past. They’ll see your stuff and give you the money, believe me.

Matt: Even if that sentence you said wasn’t the most ridiculous piece of shit I’ve ever heard – and it was – that’s not how my owners are gonna see it. They’re going to look at you hesitating before hitting wide open holes, and they’re going to think it’s because you’re content now that you got paid. And they’re going to think I will act the same way.

Chris: I’m not hesitating.

Matt: Then what is it? It isn’t your line; they’ve been solid. Come on, I know you’re holding yourself back. You gotta tell me what it is.

Chris: Fine. I’ll tell you why my play is making people like Javon Ringer look good. It’s Hasselbeck, man.

Matt: Matt Hasselbeck? Why?

Chris: You know he hasn’t had an effective running game since Shaun Alexander. He gets uncomfortable when somebody good is running back there. I don’t wanna face an angry Matt Hasselbeck, man. So I’m just not hitting the hole as hard.

Matt: Come on. You expect me to believe that? You’re scared of that old-ass white boy?

Chris: Dude. Matt’s a monster. He’s psychotic. Know why Kenny Britt really got hurt? He called Hasselbeck a game manager. Dude literally got down on his knees and tore out his ACL with his teeth. Ain’t even lying, man.

Matt: Wow. That’s crazy.

Chris: So you see, man, there’s nothing I can do about it. You think I like people talking bad about me? I heard that even Nate Raby was going to do a piece on me, call me his biggest disappointment of the first half of the season.

Matt: Nate Raby? The up and coming sports writer with looks, talent, and a heart of gold?

Chris: The same!

I must again stress that this is a 100% authentic conversation that was not fabricated in any way.

Matt: Sorry it’s been so tough on you. I guess I’ll keep playing hard. But you have to at least break one 100 yard game soon. Show them something so it looks better for me. Please.

Chris: I’ll try. But if Hasselbeck so much as looks at me after a long run, I’m gonna tell him it was you who told me to.

Matt: Shit, man, don’t do that. I don’t wanna die.

Posted by Nate Raby

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