Tag Archives: Stevie Johnson dance

by | February 3, 2012 · 9:22 am

My Time in the Super Bowl Village: OR, Indy’s Almost a City Now!

Nate: Man, Ben, thanks for giving me an all expenses paid trip to the Super Bowl Village and NFL Experience last night!

Ben: I didn’t pay for anything. You live in Indianapolis.

Nate: But I charged the NFL Experience tickets to your account.

Ben: Yeah, you’re going to pay me back.

Nate: I don’t have to pay you back? You’re the best boss ever. Anyway, let’s talk about what I saw last night in the Super Bowl Village.

Downtown Indianapolis was bustling with noises and colors last night. The dominant color was blue. Everyone was wearing Peyton Manning jerseys, obviously in an effort to convince Jim Irsay not to cut him in March. Either that or it’s the only shirts they own. I’m leaning latter.

Anyway, the biggest attractions outside of the NFL Experience are the Xbox 360 Kinect FanDome, the roman numerals, and the zipline. I hate to be a downer, but these three things have one thing in common: they are incredibly lame. All three had really long lines for something that seems pretty anticlimactic. Either you get to play fruit ninja on a tv instead of your phone, you get to take pictures with a bunch of letters, or you get careened across the lifeless Indianapolis skyline while a bunch of people shout at you. To be fair to the zipline, though, it seemed to be a huge hit. People were cheering and shouting as people zoomed by, and I probably would have tried it if not for my phobia.

Ben: Afraid of heights?

Nate: No, afraid of pointless wastes of time.

Besides that, though, the atmosphere was nice. There were plenty of booths for Super Bowl sponsors, and everyone seemed happy and in good spirits. I like to joke about how this is the best thing that will ever happen to Indianapolis, and it’s almost certainly true, but they are handling it very smoothly this year. I don’t expect the NFL to come back any time soon, but it’s definitely going a lot better than the Dallas debacle.

For me, the best part of the night was the NFL Experience. And I say this without any shred of sarcasm, humor, or irony: if you are a football fan who truly appreciates the ins and outs of the sport, you NEED to go to the NFL Experience if it is ever near your home town. It has just the right blend of exhibition, interaction, and merchandising to make it a really enjoyable time for football fans of all ages. There are also celebrities there too! We walked by Plaxico Burress, and it took everything within my and my girlfriend’s power not to make a gun joke. Plus I didn’t really know which joke to make.

Ben: You didn’t even do the Stevie Johnson TD Dance? I’m disappointed.

Nate: I know. I tried to think of something but there was just nothing in the chamber.

The museum was a lot of fun. They had moved panels of the Hall of Fame and had an entire section with the Lombardi Trophy, the AFC/NFC Championship trophies, and a case of the Super Bowl rings.

Ben: I’m assuming you took a picture of the best one.

Nate: You bet I did!

Ben: Missed it by one!

Nate: The interactivity stuff was a lot of fun too. You could take pictures with pads on, kick an extra point or 40 yard field goal, or see how far you can throw a football. And I’m proud to say that my spiral hasn’t lost anything since high school.

Ben: Max distance still ten yards?

Nate: Twelve now!

Ben: Oh, much better.

Nate: There was also an awesome draft podium where you got to grab a jersey of your favorite NFL team and pretend like you were the number one draft pick. I must have been so excited that something happened to my hair:

Roger Goodell not pictured.

The food inside of the NFL Experience was predictably overpriced, but as I wasn’t very hungry it wasn’t an issue. Overall, the only thing I wish I could have had more of is time. If only I didn’t work, I’d spend my entire day in there just absorbing all of the football fun I could.

Overall, Super Bowl Village is a marked upgrade from the way Indianapolis usually is. It’s crowded, but if you’re a football fan and the Super Bowl is in your town you’d have to be crazy not to go.

Ben: Thanks for the report Nate! Now, about the money you charged.

Nate: Don’t worry! I’m making a prop bet on Kelly Clarkson’s navel. Nothing can go wrong.

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by | November 29, 2011 · 7:59 am

The Unveiling of the Stevie Johnson Memorial Moves Like Jagger Award

I was going to write about Josh Freeman being really disappointing this week, but I’m not sure that I need to go into detail about it. Dude has 12 TDs vs 16 picks, his team has lost 5 straight, and his hair isn’t as awesome as it could be.

Josh Freeman's non-football ventures

So yeah, there’s your favorite player sucks. Maybe I’ll expand if he tosses two INTs to the Panthers next week.

What really pushed me away from writing about Freeman was last night’s lashing on Monday Night Football. There are plenty of storylines coming from last night’s game, and a lot of them are interesting. The Saints stay ahead of the Falcons, the Giants are on a 3 game skid, not mentioning Mark Ingram without saying his dad is in jail (okay, maybe that’s not interesting at all and more annoying than anything). But what I liked more than anything last night was the dancing. Oh, the dancing. With 73 points scored between both teams, there was a lot of celebrating. So here are last night’s nominees for what I am now calling the Stevie Johnson Memorial Moves Like Jagger Award:

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Lance Moore Does the Bernie

After his second touchdown of the night (and on my fantasy bench, naturally), Lance Moore dropped the touchdown and decided to do a move known as the Bernie. I loved every second of it, especially the nod before and after.

My favorite part is what the video doesn’t cover: how he grabs the football and runs all the way to the other side of the field. I thought the celebration was going to continue, but instead he Barry Sanders’d it to the ref on the far side. Like I said, I loved it, but I don’t think the Giants did. Because when they scored, Brandon Jacobs had his own dance.

Brandon Jacobs Dances for an Uncomfortably Long Time

Look at that big boy go. I didn’t like a lot on this drive. I didn’t like the defenseless receiver call on Quddus. I didn’t like the lack of tackling from the Saints. I didn’t like the fact that 21-10 was now more manageable for the Giants than 21-3.

But boy do I love those moves. If I hated on it, it would just be out of envy.

I think a lot of Saints fans had a problem with how long it went on, but I kind of liked it. It made the Saints angry; they played Jacobs harder, and he didn’t do too much more for the rest of the game. Also, no one should ever make a big man stop dancing.

The Dunks: How To Do It

Getty Images

Jimmy Graham. Look at the elevation. And he didn’t even break the goalpost this time!

How Not To Do It

So...close...

Aw, Drew. Poor guy, too short to get up there and dunk it. I love that he apologized to Michael Jordan for this.

Keeping With Basketball: The (Sorta) Alley-Oop!

The best part of this video (found here) is not so much the celebration, but the way Pierre Thomas waves Aaron Ross away. “Dude. You’re not going to catch me. You’re going to spend one more breath than you have to. Save it for when you really need it, man.” At least that’s what I thought his brief hand wave said. It could have been a mocking wave telling Ross to try and tackle him. Whatever, I like my version better.

But then when he gets into the end zone, he waits for Jermon Bushrod to come celebrate, then tosses him the ball so the left tackle can spike it. This was obviously planned, and while I’m making up conversations that probably never happened, why not add this one:

Pierre: Jermon…I’m sorry. I had sex with your girlfriend.

Jermon: Dude. That’s not cool.

Pierre: I’m sorry man, I was drunk and she…I’m sorry. How can I make it up to you?

Jermon: Can I have sex with your girlfriend?

Pierre: No.

Jermon: Oh. Well, can I spike the ball if you score?

Pierre: Fine. But only if it’s a TD that puts us up by 25 points.

Jermon: Oh come on, that’ll never happen.

===

So those are the nominees. And the winner is…this is so exciting!

Brandon Jacobs Dances for an Uncomfortably Long Time!

I know my Saints fans will be upset with me for this, but there is sound logic behind it. After last night and three straight losses, the Giants needed to win something.

Go ahead, big fella. You dance all night. Nobody’s stopping you.

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by | November 28, 2011 · 10:51 am

Monday Morning Jerkface: Week 12

With the Monday night game still to come, there weren’t any surprising results in week 12 but plenty of surprising moments.  With the Suhspension still on the horizon, there’s plenty to talk about!   I just told Microsoft Word to learn the word “Suhspension” by the way, as I doubt this is the last time I’ll be using it.

On the inside, I'm still laughing

Stevie’s Dance

By now I hope you have seen Stevie Johnson’s epic touchdown dance but if not, click the link.  After Buffalo takes a 13-7 lead against the Jets on Sunday he starts to dance, and them pretends to shoot himself in the leg before transforming into a Jet and crashing into the ground.  The first part of this dance is obviously aimed at Plaxico Burress who spent a bit of time in prison after accidentally shooting himself in the leg at a night club.  I was monitoring twitter closely when this happened, and the response was interesting to say the least.

At first everyone was laughing their ass off, posting and retweeting links to the dance.  Then as time went on a different group of people began to let their voice be heard.  It was the party poopers who thought this was a disrespectful and awful act.  I saw people calling for fines.  Well, it certainly was disrespectful…but to what level should we really be concerned about this?  Charlie Sheen’s meltdown has been referenced and parodied by people in his field, why is this any different?  If you don’t like the dance I understand, but lets just keep it in perspective.  If the personalities and celebrations I didn’t care for weren’t on center stage, my enjoyment of the game would probably be lessened.  The league could stand to be a little bit more fun from time to time.  Burress himself didn’t have much of a problem with it, saying that the mockery “Doesn’t bother me at all”.  The only people Johnson really has to apologize to are his teammates for getting a penalty.  And for the record, the gunshot part of the celebration didn’t even earn the penalty.  It was when he went to the ground that the flags came out.

That being said, I wouldn’t have a problem if Plax was pissed off.  The prison term was no doubt a very hard time in his life.  Jets fans have a right to boo Johnson, post about it on message boards, etc, but that’s where it ends.  Being made fun of is a small price to pay for being paid millions of dollars to play a game and I think Burress understands that, so good for him.

After all, he did get the last laugh.  Perhaps the next time Plaxico scores a touchdown against the Bills he will throw the ball up in the air and then drop it, Stevie Johnson style.

Tebow time…sort of.

Every week I say to people, “this just can’t keep happening” and then like clock work, once a week…it happens.

His passing stats were not completely abysmal (9 for 18 for 143 yards) but he certainly didn’t look all that impressive once again.  It took two missed field goals from Nick Novak and another incredible effort by the Broncos defense to seal the overtime victory.  It’s going to be hard to reason with Tebow-maniacs until he loses a few games, so I will avoid making anymore rational arguments until then, as I really don’t like being shouted down by people who just keep saying “HE WON THE GAME!” as if I am arguing a different point.

In a somewhat related story, as they were also involved in the game, the Chargers have apparently just quit on Norv Turner.  I don’t condone pro athletes doing such a thing, but I think if he was my boss at McDonald’s or something I’d probably react in a similar fashion as he just doesn’t seem to be an inspiring figure.  Which begs the question, why is Norv Turner trying to run the west coast offense at a McDonald’s?  I think I’ve made some good points here.

More Romo

I know there are a few people who thought the guest piece on Romo was a little unfair.  After all, Romo has been criticized by the media as hard as almost any QB in the league and to argue that he is given a pass can seem on the surface slightly disingenuous.  Thing of it is, there is a part of the media who have reacted entirely too hard in the other direction.

Take NFL.com columnist Michael Lombardi, a highly respected journalist who has worked with Bill Walsh and Bill Belichick in the past.  He wrote about Tony Romo after Thanksgiving and tried to explain his tendency to throw interceptions.

“Too much is made of Romo’s interceptions, especially early in the game.  He is like the centerfielder in baseball that can get to almost every ball, which is why he has more errors than a player that can’t cover as much ground”, Lombardi said, and my head exploded.

The Dolphins turned two early game interceptions to a combined total of 3 points.  If they had capitalized on these two picks, which set them up with great field position each time, it is very possible that the Cowboys do not win.  It is easy to glorify late game heroics, and over simplify everything else.  It’s not always as easy to take a look at what happens in a game and put it in perspective logically.  Against a better team he will not be able to get away with this.  The part about playing center field is too goofy to even dignify with a response.

That being said, Romo is playing pretty well overall the last month and has the Cowboys in position to win the NFC East.

Other Stuff

-Interesting thing happened in Baltimore on Thursday night: the 49ers couldn’t run the ball.  And when they can’t run the ball, Alex Smith looks…well, like Alex Smith.  Defensive coordinators definitely took note.

-The Houston Texans are being decimated by a gypsy curse.  They have already lost their best defensive player for the year, their starting QB for the year, their best WR for several weeks, and earlier in the year their best running back for a few weeks…now back-up QB Matt Leinart looks like he is probably done for the year with a broken collarbone.  We are sending them a copy of the Stephen King book “Thinner” in hopes that it provides some kind of solution to the problem.  If you don’t get that joke, it probably means you have good taste!

-The Buccaneers should just wear their awful orange uniforms the rest of the year, since they seem to be as woeful as the teams that donned those putrid things years ago.

-The revised Suh apology seems like it was written by the commissioner himself.  How about that!

-Caleb Hanie threw three picks against Oakland on Sunday but still almost led them to a come from behind victory.  If he would have been any worse the Bears might have tried to explore other options, and if he would have been any better they’d probably feel comfortable.  It will be interesting to see how those NFC wild card spots are sorted out.

Enjoy Monday Night football everyone!

Posted by Ben Van Iten

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